MMMM it's been so long since my last post!
February 24th... not that you care but that is a very special day to me. Two important things happened on that day, five years apart. Let's just say it was the beginning of something and the end of that same something. Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that since then, I've been having trouble just trying to cope with things. It was easy at first, but things have been getting rough lately. I'm just trying to live my own life but... bitches, man.
Ugh so anyways, that girl I said I liked, I don't like her anymore. I stopped liking her after I came back from...
SACRAMENTO!! that's right, I went to Sacramento from Friday before last to Monday before last. How was it? Exhausting but very fun and exciting. I learned a lot of things and I met a lot of cool people. But most of all, I got to bond with my old friend Zoltek. Sacramento pretty much sucks so try to avoid that place at all cost.
Uhh after I came back, trying to get back into the swing of things was pretty hard. School is really sucking hard now and it feels like I've lost all motivation. Lately, I've been caring more about my social life lately. Before, I never had to worry about it because things were pretty stable but since college it's been hard trying to get back on my feet.
Since I got back and life kind of caught up with me, I've had a lot more time to think which is a dangerous thing. My mind always tends to drift in a certain direction towards a particular person. It's kind of hard to make yourself think a certain way. It's like lying to yourself. You convince yourself that if you lie long enough, you'll start believing it. I hope that one day I'll be able to have a change of heart and just go in another direction, but with the way things are going, who knows? This aching is gonna be the death of me 8(.
Sad songs don't help either. I would say FML but too many people have been saying it lately. It's annoying and overly used so it's no longer funny. It's just whiny when people say it now. So FUCK YOUR LIFE but mine just sucks.
Time for a poem I think. They usually help...
Her VoiceHer voice is sweeter than a bee's breath
and her sound waves tightly hug my ear
When she sings, everyone gets quieter than death
and on the phone she feels so near
I'm deaf to everyone when I hear her speak
Her breathing is like the gentle drops of rain
Hearing her laugh always makes me weak
I would give my ears to hear her say my name again
Everyone else just sounds like a squawking crow
and I'd rather listen to the songbird sing
Oh how miss hearing her song so
But there's a reason for everything
If I was ever given the choice
I wouldn't pick a thing over her voice
Bleh I really lost momentum near the end. But I really have an essay to do so... bye!
